🚨 **BREAKING CHAOS ALERT** 🚨: Trump’s brainrot has successfully pitched YouTube as the newest ballroom diva! YUP, you heard that right! 💃💰 Forget the Secret Service – it’s all about the Alphabet executives brunching it up at Mar-a-Lago while speaking in hushed tones about ANTITRUST 🧐💀 (that’s code for “let’s not get sued, fam”). 🤫 John P. Coale, aka “Lawyer of the Year” for avoiding legal landmines like a pro, had dinner and dance parties with Google execs while feasting on some STONKS-level gourmet lunch. 🍽️💵 "Let’s not talk about anti-trust," he said, probably over a plate of scandals. Like, bro, that’s like ordering a salad at the Cheesecake Factory. They’re all out here playing with “let’s-coach-Google-how-to-not-get-sued” instead of actually talking about the *actual* money moves 💸. “Not Google and not me,” he literally said. Yeah, bro, we get it—you’re trying to dodge that legal TikTok like a champ. 😂🔥 *Leaked Developer Quote*: "We should just implement the 'Dance Your Way Out of Legal Trouble' feature. #GamerLogic" 🎮💁‍♂️ 🔮 HOT TAKE ALERT: Next up, we’ll see TikTok influencers running for office just to escape legal battles. And if that happens, I’m taking my coffee maker with me! 🚀👀