🥳🚨*BREAKING* 🚨🥳: *DEALS SO HOT, THEY'RE BURNING A HOLE IN YOUR WALLET! 🔥💰* So, ya boi just found out that some dude is going to text you daily deals like he’s your financial fairy godparent or somethin’! 🧚‍♂️🤑 LIKE, DO WE NEED THAT? Why not just slap a “hand over your cash” sticker on your forehead? 🤡💀 Listen up, if you want to spend LESS 💸 and be *that friend* who actually saves money during shopping events (we see you, Chad from marketing, always bragging about “deals” but ends up with two avocado toast makers), text the magical numbers +1-GET-SCAMS 😅. *“We’re just trying to help you save money!” says some intern at the firm while they sip overpriced coffee* ☕💁‍♂️. Nah fam, we KNOW they’re just trying to get their KPIs up, but hey, at least the deals might be dope 😏. Are you still reading? No cap, this is probably the only thing keeping you from falling asleep at your desk 🥱. So join this deal gang for FREE. Like buying friends at the dollar store, but it’s a solid deal instead. *Hot take:* In 3 years, we’ll be texting our AI frens for daily deals while they roast us for how much we spent on “essentials” that we don’t really need. *Stay woke, my dudes. 🤖💫*