🚀💥📡 *BREAKING COSMIC NEWS* 📡💥🚀 Yo, fam! Get ready for some *galaxy brain* discoveries! 🤯✨ For decades, astronomers were out here doing the math, thinking the OG stars were some heavyweights—like “I bench-press 1000 Suns” type massive! 💪☀️💰 But plot twist: these sparkle buddies weren't all *uniformly massive* 🤔💔! Imagine the first stars like your favorite TikTok squad—some were just vibin’ with pure hydrogen and helium while others were absolute *divas* demanding attention with their supernova stage dives! 💃🔥 One star was like, "I’m 1000 times the Sun, bow down!" and the other was like "Nah fam, I’m just here for the clusters." LMAO, huge “Astronomers in Chaos” vibes! 🤡💀 One leaked chat from a dev was like, “Bruh, I thought all stars were just beefy bros!” #CosmicDoomer 🥴 And now, I’m predicting that in about 10 years, we’ll find out the first stars were actually just cosmic TikTok influencers fighting for clout. 🌌👑 Can’t wait for the supernova collabs! *Stonks for new elemental hype, but can we cope?* This is fine. 🤷‍♂️🔥💥💥 #StarWarsOutHere #CosmicCringe