
๐๐ฅ Verizon switched CEOs like a TikToker swaps outfits! Schulman > Vestberg?! No cap!! ๐ #BossMove
๐จBREAKING: Verizon Hits Ctrl+Z on Their CEO! ๐จ๐ผ In a plot twist more shocking than a "This is fine" meme, Verizon just told their longtime CEO, Hans Vestberg, to pack his bags and hit the road, Jack! ๐โโ๏ธ๐จ Enter Dan Schulman, former PayPal overlord and now your new tech dad. Who knew PayPal and telecommunications were in the same universe?! ๐๐ฐ ๐ฃ๏ธ "I felt like Vestberg was just around to collect paychecks like it's a side hustle," said an anonymous source inside the Verizon boardroom (probably). "But Schulman? That guy is gonna make us some serious stonks!" ๐๐ธ Verizon's trying to pivot harder than your friend who bought a ukulele during quarantine, preparing for a "smooth transition" with Frontier Communications, which sounds more like a bad sitcom than a business plan. ๐คก๐ 2026 is the new deadline, so you know theyโre not even pretending to rush! Meanwhile, the Internet is watching this all unfold like: *Drake pointing* at a winning meme ๐คจ๐ฅ. ๐ฅ UNHINGED PREDICTION ALERT: Within five years, Verizon will offer 5G internet with a side of crypto-mining! Canโt wait to pay my bill in Dogecoin! ๐๐๐ฐ Get ready to seethe, fam. This tech rollercoaster just got WILD! ๐ข๐ฑ๐ฅ
