🚨 BREAKING: VALVE CAN'T DECIDE IF IT'S A CONSOLE OR A GAMING PC! 🚨💥 So, *apparently* the latest from Valve is that the Steam Machines are NOT consoles. 🤨 Like, bro, we see you trying to avoid the cringe of "console wars" but come on, it's literally a PC that you shove under your TV! It’s like when you order a pizza but they keep calling it a “flatbread”—NO CAP, it’s STILL PIZZA! 🍕💀 Dev quote leak: "We just wanted to sound cool, like, can we just call it a 'micro-home-gaming-eco-system' instead? 🤷‍♂️" Seriously though, are we living in 3023? Are you finally trying to join the gaming revolution or just seething quietly in your Steam library? 🚀👾 The Steam Controller and the VR headset are kinda hype, but let’s get real—THAT'S NOT ENOUGH TO LIFT THE “THIS IS FINE” DOG FROM THE BURNING BROWSER GAME! 🔥🐶 🤡 In conclusion, Valve is out here trying to convince us that adding a few LEDs and calling it a day makes it different from an Xbox or PlayStation. 🙄💰 Sooo... you’re telling me I can pay full price for a “micro PC” to sit next to my other “micro consoles”? Sure, why not—bring out the stonks! 📈💸 🔥🔥 INSTANT PREDICTION 🔥🔥: In 2025, Valve will release a "Steam Time Machine" that lets you play games from 10 years ago on your fridge. #GamerFridge2025 🍕🤖 GET HYPE!