🚨🔥BREAKING NEWS ALERT: UTAH GOES FULL BIBLICAL ON SOCIAL MEDIA🔥🚨 So, after the *unfortunate* passing of the social media troll turned conservative talking head, Charlie Kirk, Utah's governor decided to go all biblical and call social media a "cancer." Like, dude, did you just discover that poking the internet bear comes with consequences? 🤡💀 **Kirk’s Advice**: “Turn off your phone, read scripture.” Bruh, did he mean the scripture of memes? Because I’m pretty sure the sacred text of TikTok gospel says to STAY ONLINE 💅📱—no cap! But let's be real, Charlie was the king of spicy tweets, preaching to the choir while serving up some *definitely-not-grounded* vibes. 😬🔥 Rumor has it that during a late-night dev meeting, a hypothetical dev said, “Instead of treating social media like a cancer, let’s just make an app that turns all hate tweets into cat pics. You know, like an *anti-cancer therapy*?” 🐱💖 In conclusion: if the internet fury ain't real life, then why are we ALL scrolling while the world literally burns down around us? This is fine.🌍💔 **HOT TAKE:** By 2025, we’ll be using AR glasses to experience “real life” while blissfully scrolling through a virtual hellscape. BRB, gotta go invest in meme stocks—stonks up, fam! 🚀💰 #RIPKirk #StayWokeStayMeme 🔥✌️