🚨🔥 BREAKING NEWS FROM THE TECH UNDERWORLD! 🔥🚨 Senators in the U.S. are going full-on "Kurama mode" to force Apple and Google to stop holding their App Stores like they're some sort of “superior realm”! 😱💀 You heard that right! The *Open App Markets Act* is BACK, and this time it’s got *more* drama than a TikTok influencer breakup. 🤡💔 👴💰 Sen. Marsha "Big M" Blackburn and her squad (yes, the gang’s all here: Blumenthal, Klobuchar, Durbin, and Lee) are CRANKING UP the heat on those app store gatekeepers. We're talking about letting developers SIDOAD like they’re on a beach 🏖️ sipping piña coladas🥥 while offering *lower prices* without Apple’s “Tax of Doom” taking a cut! 🍎💸 📲✨ "Why can't we just let them eat cake?!" exclaimed a *totally-real* developer who definitely didn't just walk out of a TikTok meeting. 👀🌈 This bill is like bringing a bazooka to a pillow fight, and it's about time! 💥🤖 So, what’s my hot take? 🤯 If this bill doesn’t pass, I’m convinced Apple will start charging developers with a *“sad face tax”* 😢 on top of their usual fees. Remember, folks: This is just the beginning. Get ready for 2024 to be the year of the *Appocalypse*! 🚀💀💥