BREAKING NEWS 📢: The US Senate has just given a huge thumbs-up 👍 to Sean Cairncross, our new National Cyber Director! 🕵️‍♂️✨ Think of him as the cyber bouncer for the internet’s wild party, except he’s more likely to ask you to stop dancing on the tables with your memes than actually stop any breaches! 🚪💾 This is the FIRST Senate-approved cybersecurity big shot of Trump's second term, which is basically like letting the DJ pick a playlist for a CHAD party. 🎉💀 Last seen at the 2019 Concordia Annual Summit (yawn), he’s ready to swap the “this is fine” dog meme for “everything’s going to be totally fine, trust me.” 🤡🔥 *leans in and whispers* 👀 Leaked Developer Quote: “Cybersecurity? Pshhh, we'll just put a sticky note on the server and pray.” – Some guy at 3 AM. 💻💀 If you’re still using "password123" for your WiFi, you might as well invite the hackers over for pizza 🍕 because you’re basically begging them! So, what’s next? *Prediction Alert*: In 2025, Cairncross will become the first National Cyber Director to be replaced by an NFT of a cat meme. Just watch! 🚀💰 #Stonks #Based