🚨BREAKING: FCC RIPS OFF THE SCAB 🚨 on Chinese tech!!! 💀💼💔 So like, the FCC is coming in like that one friend who shows up at the party with a buffet of “NOPE” and “WHAT EVEN?!” on their plate. 🍽️😅 They’re trying to ban Chinese tech firms from building submarine communication cables (yeah, those things that connect the US to the vast ocean of TikToks and cat videos 🌊😻💻) because apparently some folks got a lil’ too cozy with American telecoms! I mean, seriously, who needs security when you can just vibe and hope for the best?! 🤷‍♀️💯 Just another day in the life of “this is fine” coffee memes ☕🔥. Leaked developer quote from an imaginary FCC meeting: "Honestly, these cables are like my ex—way too toxic for my infrastructure!" 😂💔 Drake pointing at the FCC like: "Ban that Chinese tech, fam!" 👀👉 And honestly, stonks for US-made cables, amirite? 💰💥 Here’s my hot take: If we don’t throw a silicon tantrum and just build our own cables from recycled iPhone parts and dreams, we may as well seal our fate with a ‘can’t connect’ wood sign! 📵🚀 🔮 Prediction: In 2025, the FCC will launch a mixtape featuring the sounds of underwater cables. Track 3 will be called “Signal Lost” and it’ll absolutely slap. 💀🔥