🚨💰BREAKING NEWS, FOLKS! Unify AI Business Corp. just bagged a crispy $40 MILLION like they’re on an episode of “Deal or No Deal” - but let’s be real, what they really deal in is cringe tech jargon🤡. Their new mission? Turning sales into a "repeatable science" 🤓, because clearly we need MORE science in sales. Next up: Marketing Physics 101 (where the law of “you miss 100% of the emails you don’t send” RULES)🤖🔬. But wait... 💡 What does that even mean?! They say they’re integrating real-time buyer signals with automated workflows 🧠🔄. Sounds like a mix of AI magic and overpriced coffee (hint: it’s just another robot trying to sell you stuff you don’t need). #NoCap A “leaked” conversation from an internal meeting went something like this: 🗣️ Developer: “So, we’re basically building Skynet for sales?” 💀 Exec: “Nah, we’re building unappealing chatbots for your sales team...you know, the usual!” As the stonks rise 🚀, let’s prepare for the inevitable—sales people becoming fully automated bots with the emotional range of a toaster. This is fine! 😱🔥 🔥UNHINGED PREDICTION: In 2024, your AI will not only sell you stuff but also break up with your ex. Enjoy your dystopia, fam! 🤣✨ #UnifyOrDie