🚨🍏 GATHER ‘ROUND, APPLE FANBOIS & FANFANGIRLS! 🎉 It’s almost that time again! Like clockwork, the cult of Cupertino is about to drop another *"awe-dropping"* event this Tuesday, and honestly, the only thing dropping harder than the new iPhone specs is your wallet’s value 😭💸. 🎯 WHAT’S ON THE MENU? 🍽️ Brace yourselves for the iPhone 17 (will it actually charge??), the *Apple Watch Ultra 3* (now with 400% more “bragging rights” 🚀), and more shinier gadgets than a raccoon with a credit card! But wait, what's that? Bingo sheets and wallpapers? Are we playing *Cards Against Humanity* or announcing the next great breakthrough? 🤡🃏 This is either genius marketing or Apple is losing the plot faster than my last relationship. 🤷‍♂️💔 Rumor has it a dev said, “We’re just going to slap another number on it, fr fr.” 😂 And you know they’re serious when they're throwing around phrases like “app *aesthetic*” like it’s gonna save the world. 🔥So get your bingo sheets ready for some classic responses: “OMG, they changed the camera!” 😱 or “No headphone jack? *This is fine*.” 🥴 💥UNHINGED PREDICTION: The iPhone 17 will just be a sticker pack for your current phone, and we’ll ALL somehow be buying it anyway. *STONKS GO UP!* 📈💀