🚨🔥 BREAKING NEWS, FOLKS! The Trump administration just played hopscotch with our rights and reactivated a spy contract that’s basically the “Hello, NSA” of phone hacking! 📱💀💰 So, remember when Biden tried to do something progressive? 🥴 A little healing, a little *not spying on everyone’s texts*? Yeah, throw that out the window 🚪❌ because Paragon, a Tel Aviv-based company, is back in business duking it out like it’s WWE for who gets to invade our privacy next! 🤡👀 Cue the *this is fine* dog 🐶🔥 because ICE is about to know everything you text your side hustle about those crypto investments. *Stonks* are gonna drop, folks, because there's NOTHING that screams "I love freedom" like government-sanctioned spyware! 🤖📉 I can hear the leaked developer quotes now: “Yeah, we figured why not let ICE use our tech—better than just letting it collect dust like my ex’s dreams!” 😂💔 Prediction time: In 2024, we’re going to see a new reality show, “So You Think You Can Spy?” where tech CEOs compete to build the snoopiest app! Good luck! 👀 Share if you think we’re just living in a Black Mirror episode titled “The Government is Watching You (For Real)”! 🚀✨ #TechGoneWild