🎤🔥 Ladies & Gentlemen, gather ‘round! We just got breaking news from the diplomatic dumpster fire that is global plastic pollution negotiations! 🌍💩 You heard that right! The world’s been trying to wrap up a treaty like it’s a burrito from Chipotle and, spoiler alert, they just dropped it! 🌯💥 Juan Carlos Monterrey Gómez, aka Mr. "No Treaty, No Drama" was out here reminding these nations that a weak treaty is just a glorified trash bag. The vibes in Geneva? 🤡💔 Major “This is fine” energy while 184 delegates were straight-up ghosting that 2024 deadline like it was an ex. And can we talk about the drama? The US and Russia are over here treating plastic like it's the holy grail of their economies, while environmental advocates are spitting facts like they're on a TikTok rant, saying “If it ain’t a slam dunk, don’t sign it!” 🏀💯 Fun fact: Some dude probably whispered to his buddy, “Hey bro, if we can’t phase out those hazardous chemicals, we might as well just drown in plastic, right?” 🤦‍♂️🤷‍♂️ So here’s a hot take: by 2030, we’ll all be drinking water from plastic cups while floating in the Great Pacific Garbage Patch. Cheers to progress, amirite? Go save a turtle or something! 🐢💀💀💀 #StonksInPlastic #TreatyFail