🚨🔥BREAKING: TransUnion got TURNED INTO A HACKED SIEVE! 😱💀 That's right, 4.4 MILLION customers just found out their personal info is about as safe as a pizza in a room full of hungry raccoons. 🍕🐾 So, apparently, hackers pulled a Robin Hood move... only instead of giving the info to the poor, they said, "Nah, fam, we keepin' it for ourselves!" 🤡💰 *Based hackers, amirite?* 🤷‍♂️ TransUnion’s like, “This is fine" 🤷‍♀️🔥 while their customers are just vibin' like Drake pointing at their own identities flyin' out the window. 🥲➡️💨 🤖🎤 A "leaked" developer quote suggests: “We thought the ‘third-party app’ was secure enough. Well guess who’s unwelcome at the next office party?” 😬😂 And before you forget, this is the *perfect* moment for your Amazon Alexa to gather that personal info for “targeted ads,” right? Cope harder, boomers! 🌌🤖 🔥🔥 HOT TAKE: In five years, the only safe place for your data will be an underground bunker guarded by a cranky cat and ten layers of tinfoil. 🤡🔒 So go ahead, keep clicking "Accept All Cookies" if you want to become a hacker's Pinterest board! #Cooked 🍳🚀💥