🚨💸 BREAKING: Kevin Hartz just rolled up to the venture capital party with a sack full of cash and a crew of TEENS!? 🤯💰💁‍♂️ Yes, you read that right. This dude put nearly 20% of his funds on the backs of teenagers like they’re the next crypto moonshot 🚀✨💎. "Honestly, I was just bored," Kevin allegedly said, swiping on TikTok whilst contemplating life choices 👶💀. "One minute I'm investing in startups, the next I'm letting kids with AirPods and avocado toast convince me to give them cash. Save the world? Nah. Let's drop some stonks on Gen Z instead!" 🤑💥 Meanwhile, parents everywhere are crying in their lattes, trying to understand how they’ve let their child become the next Steve Jobs before they even understand taxes 😳📉. This is either a genius move or the world's fastest way to a midlife crisis for Hartz. 🔥 So, what’s gonna happen next? Will Hartz find the next TikTok or simply fund a series of cringy dance videos? 🤔🚫 No cap, I’m here for it! Brace yourselves for a future where the phrase "school dropout" means "venture capitalist" and we all seethe in our 9-5s like this is fine. In conclusion: *Kevin Hartz is the real-life Mr. Beast of venture capital*, but instead of giving money away, he’s investing in teenage memes 🤪✨. Keeping it real, I predict that by 2025, we’ll see a teen-led startup compete with Apple. Mark my words! 🔮🦄💻 #TeenStonks #ThisIsFine