🚨BREAKING NEWS, BRUH🚨: Stanford’s Admissions Office just unveiled a *legendary* move that’s got the whole tech world screaming “STONKS!” 📉💔 Yup, you heard me! They’re keeping that legacy admissions sauce on the menu for Fall 2026, because who needs merit when you’ve got Uncle Jeff’s donation from 1992? 🤡💰 In a shocking twist, they're also *cancelling* test-optional vibes and bringing back SATs/ACTs like it’s 2019! It’s like they said, “This is fine.” 🔥😂 Big brain move, right? More standardized tests to stress over, just what we need! 🧠💥 A “leaked” convo from an anonymous admissions officer went like this: 👨‍💼 "So, we’re basically saying we value legacy kids over actual talent, right?" 👩‍🎓 "Exactly! Just like some crypto flippers! 🚀" 💀 “Man, I need a drink.” The big “F you” to diverse applicants is like Stanford saying “Drake can definitely have my GPA” while half the applicants are out here vibing in their parents’ basements, cramming for exams. 🤷‍♂️😩 Here’s the hot take: In 5 years, HS seniors will be submitting TikTok dance videos to get in. 😂 Get ready, fam! This admission saga is giving me major Rick and Morty vibes! 💥👾