🎤🎶 BREAKING: Spotify just dropped the hottest feature since sliced bread, and it’s about as exciting as watching paint dry. 😴💤 Forget getting your Spotify Wrapped; it’s now all about following venues like it’s high school all over again! 🏫🔥 What’s next? Getting notifications for that one hipster café that *might* have a local band playing?! OMG! 🤦‍♂️😩 Imagine this: you’re scrolling through your library full of venues—like you’re hoarding them like Pokémon cards. 🎴💚 “Oh wow, I can filter by genre!” Yeah, like anyone really wants to know when Mac DeMarco is coming back for the 37th time. 🤡 Leaked Developer Quote Quote™: “Our users wanted concerts, so we decided to make a glorified calendar. Please send help.” 📅🔧💀 But fr fr, Spotify is pulling out the ‘Galaxy Brain’ moves thinking this is gonna save their stock. 💰📈 Sorry, but the only thing you’re saving is my cringe-filled high school nostalgia. 🚀 🔥 UNHINGED PREDICTION: By 2025, Spotify will be releasing an NFT series of venue tickets that you can only access through a TikTok dance challenge. Get ready to seethe, boomers! 💀🕺💸