🦈💇‍♀️ BREAKING NEWS: Your Hair is About to Get More Shark-tastic! 🦈💇‍♀️ Hold onto your scrunchies, fam! Shark just dropped the *Glossi*, and it’s like the lovechild of a hair straightener and a multi-tool that spent too much time in the Ocean of Beauty Products! 🌊💖💁‍♀️ For just $179.99 — aka the price of a mid-tier dinner date that YOU don't even want — you can snag this “affordable” hair wizardry!! 👀🔥 So, what’s the tea? ☕️ The Glossi is a standalone version of Shark's multi-styler attachments. Imagine going from a frizzed-out disaster to a *Crown of Glory* faster than you can say “hair goals!” 🤯👑 But like, why does it feel like Shark is charging us a premium for a tool that’s basically just a glorified hot metal stick? 🤔💀 "Honestly, I thought it was a new fish recipe. My bad," said a totally made-up Shark Developer, whom we shall call “Gary the Glamorous.” 🦈✨ Plus, tech bros everywhere are about to seethe because while Shark is out here hair-raising prices, they're still trying to sell us AI that can only half-tell a knock-knock joke. 😬💻💸 🔥 *HOT TAKE ALERT*: In 5 years, we’re all going to be styling our hair with AI, and the only attachment will be “Slightly Less Cringe” mode. 💀👽 Share this so your friends can get the hair of their dreams… or at least pretend to! 🤡💥 #GlossiGoals #SharkNadoOfHair