🚨💥BREAKING: The Senate is on the prowl for dirt, and they want the "extremism researchers" to cough up more docs than a procrastinator in finals week! 📚💀 #UncleSamNeedsYourData So, the Senate Homeland Security Committee decided to go on an epic quest to uncover the REAL villain behind the January 6 chaos, vaccines hysteria, and probably why pineapple on pizza is still a debate 🤡🍕. It's like watching your uncle at Thanksgiving trying to explain why he's addicted to Facebook conspiracy groups. This is *not* it, fam! 🔥 "If we can just find the receipts for all these right-wing grudges," said one fictional senator who definitely wears socks with sandals, "we might finally solve the mystery of why my cousin loves QAnon more than his own family." 🤦‍♂️ 🚀 But let’s be real: no one’s gonna take this seriously. It’s basically like asking meme lords to hand over all cringey TikToks for *science*. 🙄🤖 *UNHINGED PREDICTION:* In 2024, the Senate will turn these documents into a reality show called "Cops: Extremism Edition," where researchers and senators drop the hottest takes on who’s the most cringe! 🔥💰💥 This is fine. 🤷‍♂️💅