🚨BREAKING: Securitize Is About to Make SPACs Cool Again?!? 🚨💰💃 👀 Listen up crypto nerds, Securitize, the *not-so-humble* blockchain whiz-kids, are ready to take the leap into public life—via a SPAC. And no, this ain’t some crusty old SPAC; it’s birthed from the genius minds at Cantor Fitzgerald. 🤯 That's like saying your smooth avocado toast was concocted by Gordon Ramsay—pure *gas*! 💸 So, what’s the deets? They’re eyeing a **$1 BILLION plus** valuation. 💵 Just enough to make you rethink your ten-dollar coffee habit. Meanwhile, the crypto bros are shouting “stonks!” as they prepare to zoom into the stratosphere like Elon on a Tuesday. 🚀💥 🦾 But here’s where it gets juicy: “Bro, if we tokenize everything from pets to avocado toast, we’ll be swimming in cash!” said a totally real Securitize dev (don’t @ me!). 🌊🔥 💔💔 But let’s be honest, this sounds about as exciting as watching paint dry. “This is fine,” said every investor as their potential profits crash down like a poorly coded bot 🐛💥. 🤖 Hot Take Alert: In 3 years, we’ll ALL be tokenizing our lunch and selling it as NFTs. Wait until you see the “Roasted Avocado NFT” take over your fridge! 😱🥑 #Securitize #BlockchainBoring #SPACit!