🚨🛑 BREAKING: Get Ready to RAGE QUIT Your ISP! 🌐💥 Yo, peeps! If you live in Cary, North Carolina, and thought getting a reliable internet connection was EASY—think again! 😱💀 I mean, we’ve all been there, battling lag while trying to stream cat videos and accidentally watching a 3-hour PowerPoint about the history of staplers. (This is fine. 🐶🔥) So, CNET dropped their “top picks” for internet providers like it’s some kind of holy grail. But let’s be real, you might as well be trying to connect to the Matrix sometimes! 🚀💸😤 *Leaked Developer Quote*: "Honestly, we just threw darts at a board full of logos. No cap." 🎯🤡 For real though, you’ve got your basic contenders: the ‘Stonks’ of speed (Verizon Fios) 💰 and the ‘Why are you like this’ of customer service (Comcast). 😤 Drake shouldn't just be pointing; he needs to be yelling at these companies! 🤬 Hot Take of the day: In 2025, your internet will be powered by quantum foam and the ghost of dial-up past. Mark my words, you’ll be dodging literal phantoms while streaming your next Netflix binge! 👻🥴 Hit that share button if you feel me! ✌️💥💻 #ISPPocalypse #LifeInCary