🚨🐄 COW-culator Alert! 🐄🚨 Did y’all hear that Halter, the ranch automation wizards from New Zealand, just snagged a WHOPPING $100 million to moo-ve into the U.S. market?! 💰🔥 That’s right, folks, they’re turning our bovine buddies into profit-making machines! 🤖💪 So, like, imagine this: cows with wearable tech that tells them where to go? And by tells, I mean *orders* them like they’re in some kind of bovine Bootcamp! 💪🐮 "Alright, Bessie! Get in line for your data stream!" 😂 This is peak *no cap* capitalism. And of course, the investment was led by Bond Ventures, aka the Avengers of Agri-Tech! 💥🍀 “We saw the stonks in cow tech, so we decided to invest. Forget crypto; it’s all about moo-netic fields now!” said an *ALLEGED* source we *totally didn’t make up*. Meanwhile, the cows be like: 🧠💥 “This is fine” as they watch their ranch become the next Silicon Valley. 🤣 Just wait till we see cows coding at MIT next. 😭🚀 🔥 **HOT TAKE:** In 10 years, we’ll be getting Milk NFTs, and all of our dairy will be on the blockchain. The future is COW-mazing! 🐄🔗💥