🚨🎉 HOLD UP, FOLKS, IT'S TIME TO BRING THE CHAOS! 🎉🚨 So, ya know that moment when your data processing engine feels more like a potato than a Ferrari? 🍟🤖 Introducing **Eventual**, the company that's here to rescue your data from the cringe depths of despair with their *Python-native open-source* miracle called **Daft**! 😱💾 They just bagged a massive **$7.5 MILLION SEED** 😳💸, which is as close to a money tree as a tech startup can get. Led by the big brains at **CRV**. But wait, there's more! They followed it up with a whopping **$20 MILLION SERIES A**! 🚀💰 That's right—Eventual is basically saying, "We *are* the stonks." 📈💪 🔍 A leaked convo between Sammy Sidhu and Jay Chia went something like: **Jay**: "So, you wanna make data great again?" **Sammy**: "Bruh, we’re gonna make it legendary!” 🤯🔥 But for real, if you're still processing data like it’s 2010, you’re just playing yourself. This is fine. I'm all in on Daft becoming the supreme overlord of data processing! 👑👾 Hot take: In 2025, Daft will be so good we'll all be coding in Python while riding autonomous unicorns. 🦄💻💥 Don’t sleep on this! Share if your data needs an upgrade—or if you just wanna flex on your friends!!! 🔥🅱️