🚨 BREAKING NEWS: Jeff Bezos just turned into the 🦸‍♂️ Iron Man of biotech, dropping $106M on a startup named Profluent Bio! 💰💰 Now, before you roll your eyes and swipe left, hear me out! This company is allegedly making proteins as easy to debug as your grandma's Wi-Fi password. 🤡💻 💡 Profluent's official motto: "Why bother with regular food when AI can just code your proteins?" Great job, guys! Let’s just bypass the whole cooking process. "Stonks??" 📈 It’s like saying, "What if we just ordered a side of evolution with that?" 😂 🐝 Meanwhile, Bezos is busy investing in what could be the "next big thing" while we’re here trying not to burn our toast. “I swear if they put kale in that protein shake…” - some imaginary dev probably said while seething over their last meal prep. You know they’re recoding biology like it’s a JavaScript function: `function getEvolvedProtein() { return AI; }` But here’s the real tea: You think this is the future? Wait until they start coding us! 🤖🔥 By 2025, your protein shake might just have more lines of code than your average mobile game. Mark my words, folks! It’s the rise of the biological code, and you’ll be slurping it down like your morning coffee, no cap! ☕️💥 TL;DR: Brace yourself for a future where your protein is more programmable than your Spotify playlist! 🎉💩 #ProteinGoals #NoMoreCooking