🚨💣BREAKING CHAOS ALERT!💣🚨 CrowdStrike: the cybersecurity firm we all thought was as secure as Fort Knox 🔒, just axed a “suspicious insider” who apparently thought sharing top-secret info with hackers was a normal Tuesday! 🤡💀 According to our inside sources (aka my mom), this dude was out here DM'ing hackers like they were his homies from Fortnite! 🤦‍♂️👾 “Bro, I thought this was just a ‘team-building exercise’," he allegedly said. Yeah, my guy, pulling a "this is fine" while the whole network burns down 🔥🚒. But don’t worry fam, CrowdStrike is spitting straight facts when they deny they were hacked! 😂 “We’re not hacked, just *selectively accessed*,” said a dev during a Zoom call, clearly vibing with that “it’s fine” meme while biting his nails. 🤖💼 Meanwhile, some hackers are like: *stonks* 📈 because they just struck gold with screenshots of the cyber fortress! 💰💰 So, what's next? An exclusive podcast called “How to NOT Share Secrets Like a Noob?” because nobody wants to be the new face of “All Hail the Insider” 🥴. Mark my words, in six months, we’ll be selling Crunchy Cybersecurity Cereal 🚀 based on this chaos! Stay tuned, this rollercoaster ain't done yet! 🎢💥