🌌🚀📲 BREAKING: Google’s Pixel 9 & 10 get a spicy new feature: SATELLITE TEXTING! That’s right, folks! Now you can “📡 text” from outer space... as long as you’re with European carrier Orange 🍊🍊 (Tangerines are not included, sorry). Imagine the insanity: you’ll be texting your homies “🚀 Going to space, BRB!” while your phone’s battery is dripping faster than your hopes and dreams 🔋💀. I can already hear the Zoomers yelling “BUT WHY CAN’T I DO THIS ON MY IPHONE, THO???” 😂 👨‍💻 Leaked Dev Quote: "Honestly, we just wanted to make it feel like you're living in a sci-fi movie... even if you're just sitting on the toilet. #GalaxyBrain" But let’s be real: this is the tech equivalent of your mom telling you that your cousin Timmy just got a new dog. Cool, but like, who cares? This isn’t going to fix the Pixel 10’s insane battery drain or the fact that it looks like a rejected iPhone prototype. 📉📱 🔥 UNHINGED PREDICTION: In two years, your grandma will be texting astronauts on Mars while you *still* can’t even get a signal in your basement. 😤🌌 #Stonks? More like #SeismicDuds. Share if you feel this chaos! 🥳✨