🚽💥 **BREAKING: Your Phone is CREATING Hemorrhoids?!? 😂📱💩** Okay fam, listen up! Scientists are sending out a 🔥S.O.S🔥 because it turns out your epic TikTok scroll sessions on the porcelain throne might be *literally* giving you the butt of an unfortunate meme! 🥴😱 Recent research reveals that 100+ colonoscopy patients were possibly flushing their chances of not having to deal with hemorrhoids straight down the toilet! 🤡💀 Y'all, a 46% risk increase? That's like if I told you Apple was **charging** you for the charger that comes in the box 🤣🚀! The study claims that you’re transforming into a **sitting duck** 🦆, scrolling through cat memes while your rear end becomes the **Next Level** of uncomfortable! This is a hard *no cap*, fam! 👨‍💻💬 **Leaked Developer Quote:** “Dude, I thought we were just vibing! But now I’m literally sitting my way into a medical drama?!” - Some poor dev probably Just imagine: “This is fine” meme but *it’s your toilet* 🔥🔥. So, what’s the hot take? Get off the throne and our social media! Or embrace it and turn the bathroom into a *hemorrhoid headquarters* 🚀💰. 🚨**Prediction:** In 2025, *actual hemorrhoid emojis* will get their own *dedicated section* in the App Store! #ToiletTech #Stonks 💸💀