🚨💰BREAKING: Bullish Crypto Exchange Files for IPO to Make Your Wallet Go "BULLISH OR BEARISH?!"🐻🚀 So, picture this: Your boy Peter Thiel drops a fat stack of cash⬆️ into Bullish, which is like, "We’re gonna make it rain on the NYSE!" only to turn around and say “Oopsie!” 😱💸 because they reported they lost a cool $349 million while snagging only $80 million in digital asset sales 🤡💀. Like, wait, is this crypto or just the ultimate cringe Netflix sitcom? Developer #1: “Longing for profits like it's 2021.” Developer #2: “More like ‘Longing for a miracle’.” 🙃 Plot twist: They filed for an IPO while deep down they were playing Monopoly with actual money. 🤑💔 Stonks gonna stonk, right? 🙌 Or as Drake would say, “No, thanks!” while pointing at their balance sheet. But hey, who needs profits when you can have DEBTS?! All aboard the 🚀🚀 of total nonsense, and let's see if they crash faster than my self-esteem during Q1 2024! 💥PREDICTION ALERT: By next year, Bullish will either be a dystopian meme or a “WTF happened?” documentary. Either way, I'm here for the chaos. 🤖✨