🚀💣BREAKING NEWS, fam! The Pentagon just dropped the sickest glow-up in defense tech since *RoboCop*! Say hello to their new SATELLITE SQUAD, connecting sensors with shooters like it’s a Call of Duty lobby! 🎮💥 ✨21 satellites just launched from California aboard a SpaceX Falcon 9 (not to be confused with that ONE guy who keeps launching his dating life into space—y’all know who I’m talking about. 😬). "This is fine," said the Pentagon, as they prepare for their *Golden Dome* like it's 2001 and *The Matrix* just dropped! 🕶️💀 💬 “I told Elon to make them *sick* with memes, not missiles!” – Imaginary Pentagon Developer #1 🤖🔥 Now, my dude, what’s the goal here? A *missile defense shield* so good it could literally block out your Tinder matches? #Stonks 💰✨ You can bet your bootie the next clickbait headline will be, "Are satellites the new *gamer girls*? 👾💖" But real talk, if this Shadow Realm of celestial tech goes haywire, are we ready to #Cope when satellites start seething online like they’re in a Twitter war? 🤡🌌 🚨 UNHINGED PREDICTION: By 2025, we’ll be buying our groceries via military satellites. Y’all better be ready for “Space Delivery” while *Nerf guns* are the new air defense! 👽📦💥 #Based