🚨📈🚀 **BREAKING: Pascal AI Just Scored $3.1M to Make Investing *Sorta* Smart** 🤑💰 Listen up, fam! 🚨 *Pascal AI Labs*, the newest player on the block, just pulled a money move, raising a whopping $3.1 million! 💸💸 What are they gonna do with it? *Invest in investing.* Yeah, you heard that right! 🤖💤 These guys are all about those “autonomous investment research workflows.” Sounds fancy, but I’m just over here like 🤔 “Can we get a toaster that also day-trades?” 🔥🍞💀 Let’s be real: if my toaster can’t generate stonks out of burnt bread, I’m not about it. One “insider” (aka my cat 🐱) said, "Autonomous means it *won't yell at you* when you lose money!” — honestly, that’s *based*. And as they expand to the U.S., I can already hear Wall Street seethe like it just saw an overhyped NFT: “This is fine.” 💩😤 So what's next? A meme coin that gives you stock tips? 🤡🌕 Mark my words, within 6 months, Pascal AI will be the *Tesla of the trading world* or be canceled because their algorithms accidentally invest in *Bigfoot commercials*. #CryptoConspiracy 💥🚀 Grab your popcorn, folks! 🍿 Future’s looking wild!