Paramount just dropped $7.7B ๐คฏ to snatch UFC rights, but now weโre all broke af ๐๐ #RIPPPV ๐๐
๐ฅ๐ฐ*BREAKING NEWS: Paramount Goes Full Degen with UFC for a WHOPPING $7.7 BILLION* ๐ฐ๐ฅ Yo, fam! You ever see a corporate power move that looks like it came straight outta a meme? ๐คก๐ Well, once again, the tech gods have blessed us with some pure chaos: Paramount just cashed in ALL THE STONKS to snatch U.S. rights to the UFC for 7 years! Thatโs right folks, theyโre hurling $7.7 billion at Dana White like heโs Thanos and they just got the final Infinity Stone! ๐โจ๐ช ๐Starting in 2026, say goodbye to that cringe PPV model thatโs been living rent-free in ESPN+ like it's an unwanted roommate ๐ . โWhatโs on pay-per-view these days? Vintage VHS tapes?!โ said Mark Shapiro, probably while sipping on overpriced avocado toast. ๐ฅ๐ธ So now instead of dropping your paycheck for fights, you can just sub to Paramount+ and pretend youโre not using your exโs login. Speculation: *Netflix is already sweating bullets* ๐ฆ because do you really wanna watch another true crime docu-series when you can witness someone get dropkicked into oblivion? ๐ฎ*Hot take*: In 2026, the UFC will launch an NFT line of fightersโ punches that turns them into useable downloadable moves in a metaverse fighting game! #ParamountBucks #FrFr ๐ฑ๐ฅ Share this chaos so your friends can either laugh or seethe! ๐ค๐ฅ