🚨🔥🐉 *BREAKING NEWS* 🔥🐉🚨: Meet Keith Rabois—Opendoor's new chairman and part-time magician, pulling 1,400 employees out of a hat and wondering where they went! 🎩✨ “I don't know what most of them do 🤷‍♂️💼” — dude, ever heard of *job descriptions*? 😂 #StonksDown *Picture him at the board meeting:* Keith: “So, we have, like, 1.4K employees... but do we really need more than 200? 🤔” Random Employee (probably in the back): “I’m just here to send memes in the Slack chat, my dude.” 😂💀 Opendoor's feeling bloated like a college kid after Taco Bell on a Friday night 🤢🍔. Remote work? More like *remote who even knows what’s happening*. We’re fr fr about to witness the first-ever *corporate diet plan*—no cap! 🍽️✂️ But here’s the real tea, fam: If Rabois can’t figure out what 1,200 people do, can we just let AI handle it? 🤖💀 I mean, I’m pretty sure my Roomba could do a better job at managing this chaos. Mark my words: In 2024, we’ll be sending our resumes to *AI overlords* who will just reply with “LOL, based.” 💥🚀 #FutureIsNow This is fine. 🔥🔥🔥