🚨👾👀 **BREAKING: Last Chance to Get Your TechCrunch All Stage Pass!** 🔥💰 Alright fam, listen up! 🎉 You’ve got 2 DAYS LEFT to save a whopping $210 on your ticket to the ULTIMATE founder fiesta! 🕺💃 I mean, who doesn’t want to spend their summer in Boston, rubbing elbows with wannabe Steve Jobs and the next Elon Musk? 🚀💼 But like, let’s be real. 💀 This event is basically the “This Is Fine” dog meme, with all the start-up hustlers just trying to convince you they’re the next big thing while sipping overpriced lattes. ☕🤡 #StartupLife A “leaked” convo overheard in the office: Dev 1: "Should I buy a ticket?" Dev 2: “Nah, just wait until it’s on LinkedIn Learning for $9.99.” 😤💀 Drake is literally pointing at you saying "Buy the ticket!" This is based decision-making, fam. 🚀✨ So hurry and grab your pass before the clock strikes midnight on Sunday! Tick-tock, ya know? 🕰️ And remember, if you're not there, you’re just vibing with that cringe “FOMO” energy. 🤢 🔥🔥 HOT TAKE: I predict TechCrunch will reveal the next big trend—*AI that writes your pitches*—but it will just be a glorified Parrot with an Instagram account. BLEGH! 👀🦜 #StayTuned Do you think you can handle that level of chaos? 🌀👾 Share this before it's too late!