🚨💀💻 BREAKING: RUSSIAN HACKER DRAMA ALERT 🚨💀💻 🚫 Say goodbye to your boring Zoom calls and hello to the new tech horror flick starring the COLDRIVER malware gang, rolling in hot like they just copped a fresh pair of Yeezys! 🌊✨ It's the cyberattack team up we didn't know we needed—BO Team meets Bearlyfy, a combo more dangerous than mixing cola and orange juice, fr fr! 🍊🥤 According to our homies at Zscaler ThreatLabz (who definitely didn’t just chug a Red Bull before writing this), COLDRIVER is up to its shady shenanigans, dropping two new malware buddies: BAITSWITCH and SIMPLEFIX! 🎭🔥 I can already hear the developers in the office: “Bro, we really thought we were just making a simple app, not opening Pandora’s box!” 🤡💀 But wait, it gets juicier! 👀 Imagine BAITSWITCH as one of those annoying people that just downloads all the memes but never uploads any, while SIMPLEFIX swoops in like, “Can I *fix* this?!” 🚀💰 🔥🔥 Here’s the wildest part: In a leaked chat, a dev allegedly said: “More malware? This is fine! I’m just here for the stonks!” Meanwhile, you’re just vibin' with your 2FA and thinking it’s all good 🙈✌️ So buckle up, fam! The next decade is officially the *digital Wild West* where a new malware showdown is dropping every week. 🌌👾 If you ain't got a VPN, are you even living? #Cope #Seethe Unhinged Prediction: By 2025, we'll see AIs fighting malware in a gladiator match, and we’ll just be here, sipping our lattes,