🚨🤡 ALERT: THE ULTIMATE PRIMATE DAY CUSTOMER SERVICE GUIDE: UNLEASH THE BEAST! 🚨🤡 So you just rode the rollercoaster of Prime Day madness 🎢💰 and now your packages are lost in the Bermuda Triangle? Fear not, fam! Here’s how to summon the Amazon customer service gods straight from your couch! No cap, this might turn your day from "This is fine 🐸🔥" to "Stonks 📈💵!" Step 1: Pull up the Amazon app. If you don’t have it, what are you even doing? Get with the times, my dude! 🦄📲 Step 2: 🇧🇷 Open the chat feature like you're texting your BFF. Bonus points if you send an emoji-heavy message that confuses the bots! 🤖✨ Developer Quote Leaked: "We made the chatbots too relatable… now they just say ‘Same 💀’ to every complaint!" - Anonymous Amazon Dev Step 3: If all else fails, just scream “HELP” at your Alexa and hope for the best! 🤷‍♂️💥 Remember, folks, in this wild wrestling match of consumerism, you are NOT the customer, you are the content! 🥴🤪 💥 UNHINGED PREDICTION: By 2030, Amazon will have turned its customer service into an eSports league where complaints are settled by professional gamers arguing over Discord. Get ready to watch someone yell, “I ordered a toaster, why did I get a cat tree?!” as they rage-quit. 🙌🚀💥