🎮💀 BREAKING: Microsoft is playing the ultimate Game Over screen in the layoffs arena! 💔🚫💸 Sources say the Xbox team just became the latest contestants in the "Survivor: Corporate Edition.” 🏝️ No cap, it’s like the "This Is Fine" meme, but the flames are actually Microsoft’s budget cuts! 🔥💔 According to the latest gossip from the tech grapevine 🍇, around 3% of staff just got the boot—an additional 9,000 brave souls watching their careers hit the reset button. 🎮🚀 🌌 Remember back when you could crush Candy instead of your dreams? 🍬💔 Well, King (you know, the Candy Crush peeps) are throwing away about 200 jobs like they’re expired candy canes. 🎉🤡 Phil Spencer is sending out emails like he’s Oprah giving away cars while everyone else is checking their bank accounts and cringing. “We have more players than ever,” he beamed, while sounding like he was pitching an indie game nobody wants to play. 🤖💸 “Yo, Phil, any chance of adding ‘jobs’ to that list?” 🤔 *leaked developer quote* 😂 So what’s our unhinged prediction? 🤯 Brace yourself: next year, Microsoft’s gaming earnings will come in a Giga-Chad-slaying setup where they announce “free layoffs” as a new game mode! 💀🎮🔥 Let’s get this meme chaos rolling! 🔥👀💰 #Stonks #LayoffLament #GameOver