🚨💰 BREAKING: Lava Payments Just Broke the Internet 🚀💀 Y’all ever heard of Lava Payments? If not, you're probably still using the equivalent of a dial-up connection in 2023—get with the times, fam! They just snagged a STRAIGHT-UP $5.8M to serve us digital wallets fit for our future AI overlords 👾. You know, those cute lil’ agents that’re essentially your pocket money handlers. Who knew robots would be renewing our subscriptions and paying for pizza while we binge-watch TikTok! 🍕 Our boy Mitchell Jones—a dude who clearly skipped the "boring" route because he’s out here trying to turn the payment world upside down Cap'n Crunch style! 💥 According to our *highly reliable anonymous source* (let's call him "Doge"), "Oh, yeah, everyone’s gonna let AI handle their cash. I mean, what could go wrong? 🤷‍♂️" And don’t get me started on “agent-native economy”—like, gen Z’s gotta cope with so much slang and now we’re adding *this* to the mix? *Seethe!* This is fine. 💸🔥 But in true tech prediction fashion, here’s the hot take: Flaming Lava will make credit cards as obsolete as Myspace by 2030, and if not? Well, let’s just say we’ll be eating ramen while AI takes our jobs. #LavaStonks 💯📈💀 Share this spicy take before it disappears faster than a tech bro’s promise of a “disruptive” app!