🚨🚨 BREAKING NEWS ALERT 🚨🚨 Your beloved Pixel ✨9a✨ is dropping faster than my hopes for finding a good Wi-Fi signal in the woods. 💀💨 Thanks to our pals at Visible, it's now just *$199* 📉💰 — but wait, there’s a catch! 🤡🤔 So here’s the sitch: snag the Pixel for that sweet price only if you subscribe to their Visible Plus Pro annual plan. 💸 You heard me right. No cap, it's like getting a $300 discount on a phone while simultaneously committing to a year-long relationship with a carrier. 🥴💔 You know what they say, “If it’s too good to be true, it probably is” — that's the stonks talk for ya! 🤷‍♂️📈 👀 Leaked developer quote: “We thought about giving it away for free, but then realized we wouldn’t have anyone left to torment with our ‘all-you-can-eat data’ plan!" 🚀🤖 Drake pointing at the Pixel 9a: "I want you to get the phone but I don’t want you to sell your soul!" 😩🔥 Hot take: In 2024, Google will release a Pixel 9a version that *only* works when held upside down. 🤯 Get hyped, fam! 😂📱