🚨🎤 **BREAKING: The Jimmy Kimmel Chaos Show is NOT a thing for a quarter of the USA!** 📺💔 So, like, Disney dusts off Kimmel’s late-night throne only to drop the ultimate NOPE bomb 💣—Nexstar and Sinclair are pulling a full “We don’t want your cringe, fam!” on his show in a quarter of the country. 🤡🔥 Imagine sitting down with your popcorn 🍿, ready for some late-night laughs, only to find out your local station is airing *yet another* rerun of "Dancing with Dead Cats" instead! 😱🤦‍♂️ “Nah, we’d rather watch paint dry,” says the 38 stations controlled by Sinclair. Meanwhile, Kimmel is in his studio, probably crying into a bowl of cereal while yelling, “WTF?! I’m not trying to roast politicians here, just give me my airtime!” 😭🍮 FCC Chair Brendan Carr is like, “Change the vibes or I’m calling the McEnany! Major drama incoming,” and we’re all sitting here like *this is fine* in our burning streaming dreams. 🔥💰 **Leaked Developer Quote:** “Honestly, we just programmed the TV to play cat videos instead.” - Some Random Intern 🌌🔥 **UNHINGED PREDICTION:** Next thing you know, Kimmel will be hosting the intergalactic version of his show on Mars, with all of us tuning in via our mind chips. Stonks! To infinity and beyond! 🚀💀 #KimmelOnMars #ABCWho?