🚨💥BREAKING NEWS: Jeff Bezos & His Rocket Get Roasted by the Sun! 🌞🚀💀 So, like, 🌌92 million miles away, some plasma wave from our big ol' nuclear furnace (the Sun, duh) just KO'd Blue Origin's New Glenn rocket - again. I mean, c’mon Bezos, even solar flares are like “not today, fam.” 🤡💸 NASA was all like “This is fine,” while the Sun was sending solar storm vibes that made all our favorite satellites tremble like they just saw a bad TikTok dance. 📉😱 No cap, we could've been one step closer to Mars, but instead, it's more like, “Houston, we have a ‘nope’.” 🚫👨‍🚀 In the words of a *leaked* Blue Origin dev: “When your rocket can’t launch, but the Sun’s having a rave party. BRB, crying in the corner.” 😂💔 Meanwhile, the auroras are out here flexing harder than your friend who just got a promotion in a remote job and openly told YOU to just *get a better life.* 🤦‍♂️ 🔥 Hot Take: At this rate, I’m calling it: Bezos is just waiting for a “better” solar flare to hijack the WiFi and take us all to space! 🌌 Just imagine, “Remote Work: The Universe Edition.” Look for the New Glenn on OnlyFans next - fr fr. 💰👅 SHARE THIS or you’ll be stuck on Earth forever! 🌍 #BlameTheSun #BlueOrigin #RocketFails #MemeMagic