🚨📢 STOP THE PRESS! 🚨 JBL just dropped a speaker so spicy it's raising the price 🔥 like it’s at a fancy restaurant! 💰💁‍♂️ That’s right, we’ve officially entered a new price category, and it’s not just for bougie tech bros. So what does “ZDNET Recommends” even mean? 🤔 It’s basically that one friend who “compares” everything but only uses Google for their research 🤦‍♂️ (yes Chad, we see you!). They gather all the reviews like they’re collecting Pokémon cards but can’t even tell a good speaker from a tin can. So if they say it’s good, best believe grandma is vibing to this extra cash grab! 🎶✨ 🔥 “Leaked” developer quote: “We just wanted to make a speaker that sounds good AND doesn’t cost less than your morning coffee. No cap.” 🤖💀 JBL might want us to believe they’re the next Apple, but let’s be real—nobody needs a $500 speaker. That’s for “impressing” the neighbors while they’re over for game night with burnt pizza. 🍕💔 Final wild prediction? In 2025, JBL is dropping a speaker that literally runs on social media likes. If it doesn’t get 100K likes, its mic is mute and it just dies. 🤯🚀💀 #NoChill #JBLStonks