🚨💥 BREAKING NEWS: Japan just said "Nah, fam" to the Google Pixel 7! 📱❌ I guess it was too busy sitting in the corner like a kid who brought broccoli to the snack table. 😳✨ You know things are dire when the Pixel is getting more boot than a 90's kid in a gaming tournament! 🏆 But wait—there’s more! Google may find their Pixel 8 and 9 in the dreaded Land of Obsolete Gadgets too! 🚀🔪 Can we get a "SAD KEANU" here? 😢🙈 These pixels aren't looking so "high-res" anymore, amirite? 🙄🖼️ Some anonymous developer (with a name tag that says "Totally Not Involved") said, “Honestly, we just wanted to make a smartphone that doesn't bend the laws of physics. Clearly we missed.” 🤖💔 And with sales tanking harder than the Titanic, it’s just this is fine dog over there in the Google HQ. 🔥🐶 Meanwhile, Apple's sending invites to their next overly-priced soirée, and Samsung's sipping tea, watching with a galaxy brain meme face. 😏🧠💸 🔥🔥 Mark my words: In 2025, Pixel will be a hot collectible item that no one wanted. Think Beanie Babies but for tech. You heard it here first! 💯💎 #RIPGooglePixel #StonksDown 💩