💀🔥 Hold onto your AirPods and get ready for the most mediocre tech gossip you never asked for! 🚀 On this week’s episode of “What Do You Mean the iPhone 18 is Already a Bad Idea?” 🤡—yes, we’re at iPhone 18 now, because Apple loves to take your money and run faster than Usain Bolt on a Treadmill—rumor has it the new design is a *slight* curvature away from looking like a potato 🥔! Meanwhile, in the Apple HQ underground bunker, reports are leaking (so many leaks, it's like Apple is running a water park) that they’re chopping jobs like it’s a Black Friday sale! 🤯 “Don’t worry, guys! We only need designers for the next 5 iPhones. The world will thank us later,” a so-called “Dev” was heard mumbling into their cold brew coffee. ☕️💔 And speaking of sales, Roborock is discounting their vacuums up to 50% because apparently cleaning now does *not* require any human intervention when your robot overlord can now do it #HouseGoals. 🧹💰 But wait, here’s the *real* tea: in a shocking twist, rumored features for the iPhone 18 might include, and I quote, “a holographic concept of what the hell you’re doing with your life.” 🙃👀 Mark my words: a decade from now, we’ll be FaceTiming with IRL humans *inside* our iPhones. 🤖📱 Stay chaotic out there, fam! ✌️