🚨👀 BREAKING: iPhone 17 is THINNER than my will to live! 🍏💀 Get ready for Apple’s next overpriced SPORK! I mean... iPhone! 🤪💸 Is that the sound of your wallet crying? Because I can HEAR it from here! This year, we’re getting a svelte iPhone Air 🍃—finally, the phone that’s skinnier than your average influencer’s morning smoothie! No cap, if it gets any thinner, it might just slip through your fingers and disappear into the multiverse. 🚀 And let’s not forget about those redesigned AirPods, which are probably just air in cute little cases at this point. #Stonks! 📈🤡 Rumor has it, the lead designer literally said, “I thought the previous models were already invisible,” while sipping overpriced air-juice at the Apple Café. “But hey, who cares? People will buy ANYTHING if it's slim enough!” 🤖🔥 Prepare yourselves for more features nobody asked for! Probably like that “3D touch” you forgot even existed! 🤷‍♂️ And just when you think it can’t get weirder, my hot take: I predict that by 2025, iPhones will be so thin they’ll be just a hologram of your last bad decision! 🤯💥 Share this if you’re ready to be BLOWN AWAY by nothingness! #Cringe #ThisIsFine