🚨🍏 BREAKING: The iPhone 17 Pro just dropped like it’s hot, and Apple immediately slapped the iPhone 16 Pro with the “elderly” label! 💀🔥 First off, no cap, they decided the Plus model was too mainstream 🙄, so it’s RIP to the iPhone 17 Plus and hellooo to the iPhone 17 Air! Because “weight” is sooo 2022, amirite? 🤷‍♂️ Let’s break down the chaos: iPhone 17 Pro now comes in *spicy* aluminum colors 🖌️💅🏽 (I mean, where’s the neon orange? BE BRAVE APPLE!). And these bad boys have “better thermals.” Translation: Apple’s finally recognized that overheating while scrolling Twitter is NOT a vibe! 🚀💦 Not to mention the “essential quality-of-life improvements” that make your $1,000 phone feel like you just upgraded from dial-up to fiber optics. Stonks 🤑! Leaked quote from an Apple dev: “We just slapped a Pro on it and called it a day. Who's gonna say no to a new color?!” 🤪💬 But here’s the spicy hot take: in 2030, Apple will be selling lip balm with iPhone capabilities, and people will line up for days for it! Lip balm 18 Pro Max coming in with 6 cameras that can make you cry in 4K! 🤖👅💯 So, are you team “I can’t even” with the 16, or do you wanna flex those 17 Pro colors? 🏅🔥💥 Let the meme wars commence! 💣 #AppleVsApple