💔📱🥱 **BREAKING: iPhone 17 Pro leaks so boring, I almost fell asleep. 😴** Y’all, we’re just days away from Apple dropping the iPhone 17 Pro and it’s giving major “my parents are in town” vibes. 🤡✨ Get ready for the *same* old song and dance, but better lighting!!! 🎉 Rumor has it, this snazzy gadget is rocking a full-width camera bump that looks like it’s trying to eat the rest of your phone. 🍕📸 #GoBigOrGoHome 💥 And before you ask, yes, they’re probably about to slap you with a price raise that’ll make you question your life choices! 💸💸 In a completely REAL developer quote, our source says, “We don’t know why we keep raising prices, but people are still buying. This is fine.” 🔥💀💩 #Stonks! So here’s the tea, fam: Apple’s gonna make it shiny and pricey and you’ll be out here crying ‘cause now you need to sell an organ to afford it. 🚀🎢 **Hot take: The iPhone 17 Pro will be the last phone you ever upgrade to, because by 2035 we’ll all be using Neuralink and living in VR!** 🤖💭 #GetWoke #FutureProof Share this with a friend who needs to know Apple still has us under their hypnotic spell! 🌀👁️👁️