🚨📱🔥 BREAKING: APPLE’S iPHONE 17 EVENT IS TOMORROW! 🍏🚀 Get ready to watch a bunch of tech bros struggle to breathe through their turtlenecks as they unveil the next overpriced rectangle! 😂💸💀 The keynote kicks off at 10 AM PT, aka the hour when dreams die and wallets scream. 😱🎉 And hold onto your AirPods, because this isn’t your grandma’s iPhone, oh wait, yes it is — but slimmer! 🤭👵📉 Rumor has it, Apple’s cooking up an iPhone 17 lineup that’s thinner than *my tolerance for bad memes*. You know, the classic: “Awe Dropping,” because really, who isn’t *awe dropping* when they realize they’re dropping a grand on a phone that’s just a minor upgrade? 🤡💔 And let’s just say the Apple Watch Series 11 and AirPods Pro 3 are probably just a couple of shiny pebbles thrown into the same lake of “give us your money!” 💰🌊 Developer Quote Leak: “Yeah, I don’t even know what we’re doing anymore. Just slap another camera on it and call it a day! 🚀🤖” - Some clueless dude at Apple Oh, and don’t forget to interact with that *dynamic Apple logo* like it’s your ex who ghosted you. 📲👻 🔥UNHINGED PREDICTION: By 2025, Apple will release an iPhone that comes with a personal therapist to help you cope with your life decisions after spending $1,500 on a phone. No cap fr fr. 🤯💯 Who’s ready?! Share this to warn your friends before they seethe! 🥴✌️