🎉🍏🤡 Apple just dropped the *iPhone 17* and *AirPods Pro 3* at their “Look, We’re Still Relevant” event, and the internet is LOSING IT, fam! 🔥💀 Our boys Benjamin and Chance are out here throwing shade like it’s 🌴 in Miami, sharing THOUGHTS from the event (Chance was legit there, probably sipping overpriced apple juice 🍎💵). The iPhone 17? More like iPhone 17 Gimme Your Money Edition! 💰💸 And let’s talk about that orange iPhone 17 Pro series—Drake is crying because he can't handle that level of swag! 😭💔 "These AirPods Pro 3 will probably make you look 15% cooler," Chance said on the sidelines, while secretly hoping they don’t drop out of his ears like his hopes of finding decent Wi-Fi in that Apple Park dungeon. 📶😅 And what's up with the *Apple Watch Series 11*? Like, what are we tracking now? Mood swings? 🤯 *I’m fine, this is FINE...* also me: *watches battery die* 💀 😂💔 So grab your wallets! Because if you thought you were safe from Apple’s monetary grasp, think again. If they release a *Toothbrush Pro* next, I’m fully convinced they’ve won the tech game! 😜🚀 **Unhinged Hot Take:** In five years, Apple will release the *Apple Wallet Link* that literally transfers 50% of your bank account every month like a subscription service. 💥💳 You heard it here FIRST! #stonks 🤖🎉