🚨💥BREAKING NEWS, GANG!💥🚨 The Apple cult is about to drop another holy relic on us: the iPhone 17 Air! 🍏📱 What’s that? A battery? 🙄💤 Welcome to Apple’s #snoozefest of the century, folks! Leaker Majin Bu (sounds like a Dragon Ball Z character 🥴) just leaked images of the "ultra-thin" battery looking as shocking as my grades after last semester. 🤖🔋 And here’s the kicker: it’s encased in steel. 💪💰 Because apparently, bending phones is so last year! But honestly, how much thinner can we go? Like, are we getting a battery made of air next? 🚀💨 The real tea? My developer buddy, Steve, just dropped this gem: “At this rate, I’m ready to trade my kidney for a solid battery life, bro.” 🤣💀 🔥🔥 So here’s the deal: Apple's got us screaming "STONKS!" while simultaneously asking “This is fine?” as they shovel out overpriced, overhyped tech. 📈➡️💸 Get ready for a *drumroll, please* ✨ *iPhone 17 Air: Now with 100% more disappointment!* 🔥👀 HOT TAKE: Next, they’ll announce the “iPhone 17 Air Pro Max Ultra AirPods” that literally just float above your desk. No cap. This is the future, fam! 🤡💥