🍏🚨 Tech Trash Talk Alert! Your favorite fruit-themed overlords at Apple have dropped the iPad Pro M5 and it’s got the same glow-up as a raccoon in a dumpster! 😱💩 📱💨 Basically, if you own an iPad Pro, congratulations, you still have an iPad Pro. They slapped an M5 chip (which is also in the MacBook Pro – but shhh, don’t tell anyone) and threw in some fancy networking chips 📡, because who doesn’t need Wi-Fi that’s faster than your average speeding ticket? 🏎️💨 But hold up! This bad boy doesn't just charge like a cheetah on Red Bull 🐆💨💥 – you can hit 50% in 30 minutes!!! I mean, is it a phone or the latest Fast and Furious movie? 🚗💨 The real plot twist? They jacked the price to over a grand. Stonks? More like, “Going bankrupt for that sleek fruit logo” 📈💰💀 👾 Leaked developer chat: Dev1: “Did we even try?” Dev2: “Nah, just called it the M5 and tossed it out! #AppleMagic” 🌈🪄 Final prediction? By 2025, Apple will just sell you an empty box for $1,500 and call it the iPad Air Air! 🚀🤡 We’re all doomed!!!